No Room For Substance

I’m one of the few whose car boasts a single CD deck with no mp3 adapter, and I’m so lazy to be changing CDs whenever my ADD kicks in, so I often resort to tolerating whatever is playing on the radio.

And to be honest, it’s not that bad! It’s fun, escapism music (except for Toot It N Boot It; I hate that song!). Then I made the mistake of looking up their videos on YouTube, and it just totally killed it. I think it started with Kesha’s Tic Toc up to Taio Cruz’s Dynamite. No. Creativity. Whatsoever. Gawd! It was so sad! I hadn’t watched a music video is forever and thought there might have been a little progress, but it appears that things have gotten worse. I was saddened to hear that Usher had gone the way of dance music (ie., OMG, DJ Got Us Falling In Love Again) despite the R&B status I had associated with his name while listening to him in high school circa U Remind Me and My Way. *Sigh* Those were the good ol’ days.

It was so refreshing to watch this hilarious parody of the typical watered down musical drivel of mainstream radio. From the creative minds of KevJumba and his friends at Wong Fu Productions comes Dance To This Song.

The scary thing is that if this song were to play on the radio, it wouldn’t sound any different from any other dance song because it follows the basic formula for a mainstream song/video:

  1. First thing’s first. The 3 B’s: boobs, booty and bitches. Gotta have ’em!
  2. Cheesy dance routines.
  3. The requisite hook with some guy rapping/singing.
  4. Horrible lyrics (though these are funny because of the sheer ridiculousness of it all).
  5. The theme is basically the party/booty fantasy of almost any guy in the room.
  6. The title of the song is so dumbed down (and what’s even sadder is that Wong Fu probably put more thought into Dance To This Song than the people who pulled OMG and 143 out their asses).
  7. And the defining formulaic aspect that makes this mainstream: the auto-tuner! David Choi’s voice (the guy who sings the hook) is so garbled I can barely understand what he’s saying. (Death to the auto-tuner)

On a brighter note, there is still hope. The only mainstream songs/videos I’ve found so far that actually have substance are the two vids by Eminem. Thank goodness for his clear speech and interesting lyrics.

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